As much as we like to protest otherwise, it turns out we’re all the same once we become mothers. How many of these can you relate to?
1. You have pictures of poo on your phone. And maybe even a video of your little one doing said poo because you want to show the Health Visitor how uncomfortable he looks having not gone for five days. Maybe…
2. You haven’t got a bloody clue what day of the week it is. Unless you’re one of ‘those’ mums who goes to a different baby group every day of the week in order to establish some kind of routine when your bundle is just days old.
3. Your laundry basket is over-flowing with clothes as there’s no need to wash the little ‘uns clothes as you’ve bought/been gifted sooo much!
4. You can’t remember the last time you left the house without some kind of bodily fluid on your clothes. The baby’s, not yours, obvs…
5. You have snacks scattered around the house because you never know when the little angel is going to suddenly start wailing and you won’t want to move for fear of starting it off again.
6. Your maternity leave has gone from Netflix binges and drinking tea with your feet up to putting your iTunes on shuffle to try and find some music the baby likes and watching your tea go cold because you’re pacing the house trying to sooth a colicky baby
7. People have started unfriending/unfollowing you on social media because they’re fed up of seeing the day’s latest batch of identical baby pics
8. When he cries in his sleep and wakes himself up you feel guilty for watching the latest episode of Fear The Walking Dead while giving him his last bottle before bed
9. Daily showers have turned into a spritz of dry shampoo and a swift armpit wash with a baby wipe!
10. Your daily coffee intake has quadrupled – even though you have to reheat every other cup in the microwave.
Any of this sound familiar? How much changes the second time round? I’ll never know cos I’m only doing this once!